- June 21, 2021
- Posted by: Dua Shah
- Category: Blog
Relationships Should Become More Interdependent
Everyone craves Independence in the twenty-first century; all genders want to declare change. But, if being independent is indeed good, I have a question for everyone: Is every independent person on this earth happy in all aspects of their lives? Are you sure that Independence is the solution to the problems our forefathers faced? If not, why do individuals continue to strive for Independency? Let us discover if Independence is actually the most excellent option, or whether we are merely following the latest trend and not pursuing the most acceptable option. To begin grasping this complicated topic, we must first learn the dividing lines between dependent, independent, and interdependent.
In the early 1990s, we observed a culture in which women were financially and emotionally dependent on males. Man is characterized by his connection to the outside world, whereas women’s relationship to her household characterizes the female; main purpose of women’s only works to look after their home and family. Men, on the other hand, earn all the money. Therefore, women are more likely to be financially dependent on males due to numerous household duties they had to fulfil.
As a consequence of this situation, men started to take women for granted, convincing her that he is the one who controls the home since he earns and she does nothing more than supervise children and cook in the kitchen. It created a massive gap between the two genders, and when verbal attacks reached a new level, many women were sick of hearing them. Most women developed the perspective that they have always been considered as a daughter first, a wife second, and a mother third, but never as an individual. If she had not been born with these inherent responsibilities, she could also take on large women leadership roles in the same way that men do and earn for themselves. Females have the potential to produce miracles if given the chance, but males have governed her because they have the opportunity to demonstrate their earning ability. The battle for women’s rights has reached new heights due to all these regrets and pettiness. In those days, males held dominant positions in society, and as a result, women’s resistanced to the male gender has gained momentum by the day.
Gender equality and women’s rights have gained prominence due to the advent of the digital media age. When such awareness is strengthened and repeated, a desire grows in the minds of new generation women that they, too, want to live like men, make their own money, and be independent like men to not rely on anyone in the future ever. Their mothers, who spend their lives in dependency, have encouraged the idea as well. They want them to leave the world of dependency and enter the world of Independence and would not suffer in the same way they did. They should not sacrifice their happiness for the sake of another; they should be financially powerful to achieve wishful lifestyle; where they can create the materialistic world by fulfilling all their wordy desires. So the perception of an happy life is being attached with the infinite power of independency. Unfortunately they don’t realize that they have foolishly associated the value of happiness with independent life.
So, in this new era where women get all the information from every corner of the world through the latest technological gadgets, they believe they are not treated equally, men reject women’s rights, men refuse to encourage women to work, and he is not giving her the lifestyle she deserves—the ongoing arguments between men and women over who is better and who has not emerged its peak. Consequently, Aurat March is being celebrated enthusiastically with growing years in the streets, on TV, and in our society. Much of this is occurring as a result of women’s strong desire to be independent. With the current trend, males are also less willing to take on the burden of a dependent member. Thus, the thirst for Independence is expressed by every individual of today’s age. Now, what new generation call an independent life is all about? They believe they can handle their own financial and emotional needs, able to take care of themselves professionally and personally. They prefer to be their boss rather than work for someone else, and wish to live alone to enjoy their leisure. They believe Independence will give human fulfillment and completeness. Most people simply consider that it protects them from being let down by someone dependent on them. Therefore, based on all these beliefs, it is evident that they do not crave any human interaction and are content to be alone.
Individuals who are forging their Independence do they realize that without human influence, life becomes emotionless?
Yes, no human connection can be developed in the absence of emotions. Individuals around them get the impression that independent people are content to be alone and don’t need anyone, making them miserable because they have missed out on all the primary emotions that human needs. They would struggle to accept help; they get irritated and drive them away when people attempted to support them. Their mindset is, “NO, don’t come here at your convenience and attempt to solve my problem. “I’ve helped myself.” This mentality will lead them to trouble. There is nothing wrong with self-care, but they must recognize that they cannot do it alone and that there is no shame in seeking support. Avoiding the urge to seek help makes them vulnerable to suffering, since making yourself exposed makes you feel needy. Independence may result in feelings of isolation, unsupported and depression. Eventually, independent individuals risk being entangled in their worlds and failing to recognize how their activities influence others. They frequently lose sight of their more prominent impact on their natural environment. Most individuals desire Independence to follow their dreams of being well-known worldwide, becoming powerful, travelling the world, using cutting-edge technology, and living the high life. In a nutshell, people seek to achieve what they desire in life. A single person may accomplish a lot in life, but it doesn’t come close to channelling the strength of a community. We humans can’t function unless we empower each other.
Dependence and Independence are now ideologically opposed. Both of these facts are unquestionably true, but society cannot function on both of them simultaneously, nor can it work on just one of them. There will be no balance in society if everyone follows one of these ideas, and since we cannot expect everyone to pick who they want to be, dependent or independent; otherwise, a never-ending gender war will begin. So we may conclude that neither dependency nor Independence is a realistic approach.
Interdependence is the foundation of an equitable and harmonious society. Male needs to rely on a woman for a few things, female needs to rely on male for a few things. Both genders must overcome their weaknesses and grab the strength of each other. The areas of expertise God has given to women should be explored, and the talents that God has given to men should be exercised, and both should grow as a family; this is known as interdependence. Interdependent people are the ones who experience the highest levels of emotional balance, life happiness, and future optimistic hope since they can rely on and trust others while also working independently as required.
The best thing about choosing interdependent is that people may preserve their individual and couple identities. Interdependent relationships understand the value of maintaining their individuality outside of marriage and feel comfortable expressing their thoughts while respecting the other person. It is advisable to place one’s identity through profession, relationships, or participation in activities that one can engage in independently. To prevent being distant from one’s spouse, strike a balance between Independence and time spent together participating in fun activities.
There is a tremendous lack of interdependence in our culture; as a result, each person in our society has developed a deceptive sense of Independence. The concern is that our younger generation does not recognize that we are all co-dependent in some way. They are not drifting away from the old sense of dependency, and they are so afraid of being dependent that they leap to the independent approach. We must teach today’s youth the sense of interdependence, emphasizing that life cannot run smoothly on dependency, nor can it be well on Independence. The only way to live a happier, healthier, and more fulfilling life is to choose the road of interdependence.
As history records, we have always been dependent people. Though biologically, newborns are born helpless, our skulls have not yet fully formed around our brains when we are born. Our ability to live and flourish is largely dependent on the availability of supportive, loving individuals who provide our utmost needs. We must never overlook the fact that the cause for human existence is always another human. Whether we like it or not, we have begun our lives as dependent beings, and there is rarely a moment in our lives when we are not consciously or subconsciously connecting with others. It comes as no surprise that all of human happiness is dependent on interactions with other humans. Our acceptance or rejection will have no effect on God’s created nature